I have started a fun new blogging challenge for the next 30 days. So here goes nothing!
Day 1: Discuss Your Current Relationship
So if any of you have read my posts on marriage, you probably know that I’ve been married for 8 years to my love, Charles. Our relationship had an interesting start. My husband was born all the way on the other side of the ocean in Laoag Philippines. He came here when he was 17. What are the odds that he would come to a small town in California where I had just moved a few months prior? Bakersfield, Ca- A.K.A. the armpit of California. Yes, I agree with that statement. It is not all that great. But yet that’s where we both ended up, at exactly the same time.
We both worked at Target and slowly but surely started dating.. Instead of waiting around for this shy guy to ask me out, I broke the rules and asked him out. He was so adorably shy and had a strong, sexy, thick accent. He says he wasn’t all that confident in his English. But why wouldn’t he be? He sounded so sexy to me and I couldn’t help but fall for his dark skin and enticing voice.
We got engaged after 3 months and eloped after just 7 months. We were crazy in love. Sure, after 8 years of marriage, the lust and excitement dwindles down quite a bit. But I think we find ways to keep the romance alive. Planning regular dates is one thing we try to do regularly, having our at-home movie nights, trying new things in the bedroom, sometimes you just have to get creative!
After being with someone for so long, you really do learn exactly what they need in a relationship, and you (hopefully) can learn to grow and change with your spouse, instead of growing apart from them.
I still find him enticing. I still WANT to spend time with him. I think making an effort to have together time is really important. The second you start not wanting to be around your spouse, trouble is sure to follow. On the flip side, it’s important to also spend time apart, have “you” time without the other person. I’ve been known to smother my poor hubby. Something I’m still working on!
We’ve recently joined a gym and take turns going. We cannot go together because we have little ones. They do have child care, but our youngest is only 9 months and we don’t want to leave him there. But I kind of like the fact that we are both getting our alone time in a healthy way. I also have our girl nights and he has his guy nights. He goes out with buddies to go fishing, to see a movie, whatever it may be, and I do the same, girls night with my sisters.
Balance is important in any relationship. And I think understanding what the other needs in a partner is equally important. My husband knows that I am a needy woman. I love hugs, kisses, holding hands, anything touchy feely, that’s just me. My husband is exactly the opposite. BUT he knows what I need and tries his best to show me the affection I need. In return, I try to not be so mushy gushy all the time. Balance.
I hope to spend the rest of my life with this amazing man. He really does complete me. As cheesy as it may sound. God gave me this guy and we’ve started a beautiful family. I’m excited to see what the future holds for us. Many more crazy, fun years I hope!
Marriage Is Hard, But Worth Every Second